Lamaze Class

Lamaze Class...

When I signed Patrick and I up for Lamaze Class, I had images of floor mats, belly rubbing, and yoga stretches like the "Crouching Tiger" and the "Goddess Pose" in my mind. I imagined that we would learn a few breathing techniques like the slow-deep breathing exercises that Buddhist do ("Breathe innnnnn....HOLD. Breath outttttt. HOLD") or the theatrical "I'm going into labor breathing" ("whew. whew. whew. breathe in. whew. whew. whew. breathe in.")

To my surprise Lamaze was in fact a "Laboring For Dummies" class. As I stated before, I have been scared out of my mind about labor -- and fear of the foreign process called "childbirth" was something that I wasn't looking forward to. I was tired of people telling me about how many hours of labor they endured -- especially without helpful recommendations of drugs, sedatives, or narcotics that I could take.

Yet, during the course of our three-part Lamaze series - I realized that it was much more than a breathing class but it explained EVERYTHING about the labor process from A-Z. And because I am a simple woman -- one who merely seeks to know why and how a watermelon-sized being can come out of a hole the size of a quarter -- understanding the step-by-step process that allowed for this miracle to happen was just what I needed.

I always wondered how in the world a woman could be "in labor" for 24, 32, or 36 hours. I have never done anything that consistently in my life. But to now know that labor consists of four phases: early labor (light cramps), active labor (whoa baby! cramps), transition (why Jesus why? cramps) and pushing (Just get this baby out of me) puts it all in perspective.

I felt so confident after my Lamaze sessions that for a second I had a thought to go..(GULP)..natural! But after a few moments of reflection, I decided that drugs would still be the way for me to go. Nevertheless, I feel fully armed to pop this little monster out. So come on mucus plug, come on amniotic fluid -- let's get this party started.